Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Easter, a Season of Changes, and BFF's


                            +JMJ+
                                                                
I've not blogged in a few days.  Catching up here I guess. :)   Hope everyone had a happy and blessed Easter.  We sure did!   Hubby even went with us to mass, which was a tremendous blessing and an answer to our prayers!   We attended an earlier mass..  I have mixed feelings about it.  As a whole, I 
preferred this mass... it seemed there were more traditionally minded people in this mass, but... I have to say we know more faces at our regular mass, and many of those faces are very beloved!


The "Easter bunny" did visit my girls this year, and brought them pillow pets and candy.   They were pleased, of course. :)   Last week we got them dresses, and I personally was thankful for those great Easter sales! :)


After Easter Sunday mass,  (and photo taking in the courtyard of our church as you can see above!), we went to my next-younger sister's house, (I'm the eldest of 3 girls), and our parents and grandmother, as well as my sisters inlaws.  It was a nice afternoon.  We laughed, talked, ate too much, played "pass-the'baby" with my gorgeous 7 month old niece, the other kids got to swim.   Later that day, our youngest sister finally came, and then only stayed just a little while before leaving.  Last thing, my Robyn and niece Lauren got to hunt eggs.  We are blessed!!  Oh, and here's Rebecca that we played "pass the baby" with. :)  She's a darling!!


So this week of new changes starts my husband working evenings instead of overnights.   On a plus side, he will be home with us at night now.  And no more confusion about when he does or does not work. (I admit that rotating days working is confusing for me sometimes!) That being said, with this new schedule comes changes for our whole family.  Our days as a one-car family are nearly over.  We now are in definite need of a second vehicle.  I cringe at the expense, but I have faith that God will provide.   Just like I know in my heart that He in His mercy will get us through with other things... such as the fact that our lawn mower is in the shop, (the yard is horrible), and that's *after* spending $250 to try and fix it ourselves.... and still it won't run... and nagging at me is the certain family member(s) that is/are so completely selfish... and I've got to say that keeping silent about it is not the easiest thing in the world to do.   How I'd like to have myself a "little chat" with this person(s)...  But it won't help. *sighs*  But I digress...  once again, I need to just give this all to God.

As for MY family here in THIS house, *smiles* We are a family who firmly believes in sitting down together as a family at evening supper.  And we've always done that every day my hubby is off work.  However, since this new schedule change started today, we agreed to also make a change ... to be able to keep our family-time meals..  we have made "lunch" our "official" family meal to be together since he is leaving and working late now.   So today I made something a little special to get us started off on a tasty note. :)    Organic baby spinach topped with bulgar wheat (tabbouleh), fresh sauteed leeks, garlic, and zucchini, and a few homemade meat balls and drizzled with a simple balsamic vinegarette dressing. (Jamie Oliver style)  It was a big hit. :) 


Umm.. just some thinking out loud here.... (okay, venting)  Sometimes I wish things were different.  Judgmental people hurt my feelings, and gosh it seems like there is an awful lot of them out there any more.  We do have a few good friends who love us, (warts and all), and thank goodness, THESE friends don't try and point out my flaws (and my sins), on a regular basis.   As for the ones who DO insist on correcting me constantly, I just want to say to them, "can't you JUST be my friend?!   I'm NOT perfect..  and I don't want "perfect" friends.  I don't want you to "lead" me, or "follow" me.  Just walk beside me and be my friend."    Hubby tells me that I only need worry myself about the ones that live here in our family home.. but for me, it's hard to think that way.   

BFF's ~ I had (notice the HAD) two best friends.  Stephanie died November of 2005.  God I miss her. I will blog sometime about Steph... she deserves her own blog entry.  So I can share about how wonderful she was.  And how much I still love her.   The other "best friend" (looking back) never was truly a "best friend" at all.   Hindsight is 20/20.

Now...the "other friend"..(not Steph), I can sum up pretty fast.  I let her "lead" the friendship.  She was 8 years older than me, and we became friends when I was only 19.  She was already married with a son.  I got into things.. unhealthy behaviors... with her.   I thought it was "fun" and "exciting".. and yes, I could say she was the one who got me "into" things, ... but *I* am the one who did it, allowed it, so it's just as much my fault.  However, as I got older, got married, and had children, I started seeing more and more how she was.  How she had this inane idea that my husband somehow had "interest" in her, but (trust me, NO HE DIDN'T), but she used this tactic so she wouldn't have to spend her gas driving over.  I had to always come to her.  When I started homeschooling my kids, she didn't like it.  She still wanted me to come over, but my kids were not welcome at her house.  She said to me angrily that she couldn't figure out why I couldn't just leave them at home alone to do their schoolwork.  

As I grew in my Catholic faith, she grew in her paganism.  She ordered items LITERALLY from a coven of witches, (I am NOT kidding!) and God help me, had them shipped to MY home so her husband wouldn't see it.  I was upset, and she found that funny. (she felt I was being silly) She refused to come get her item, and as usual I had to take it to her (still in the package.. I refused to touch it).  I promise you all... she walked into her back yard and waved her hand over it and said some sort of incantation over it that THANK YOU JESUS I couldn't hear.  I was shocked, and more than a little freaked out.  That was the beginning of the end for our "friendship".  My "closed-minded" faith was offensive to her, and it ended with her chewing me out in an email, and ending it with "you're not allowed to reply".   Not allowed?  Sort of like calling someone up, chewing them out, and then hanging up before they can say one syllable.  Real mature.  Anyhoodles.   That was a year and a half ago.  She mentioned a while back to a mutual friend that she was "surprised" that I had never "called and apologized" to her.  Huh????

I know "to everything there is a season".  Methinks it's safe to say that the "season" of that friendship has ended.  And I know maybe there were times I could have been a better friend and maybe did something different that maybe would have made a difference.  I think about her a lot still.. after all, we were friends a long time... and I have even dreamed about her twice.  I do still pray for her.   She NEEDS prayer.  She's on a bad path, completely away from God, and she doesn't even see it.   In the past, I'd attempted talking to her about God.. she wasn't interested.. and I hate to say it.. but she smirked when I'd try and talk to her or invite her to things.  Like it was a joke to her.  Even today.. after all this time.. I am still frightened for her.   I did block her on facebook... simply because it was too painful to see her there.  And I have and do pray for her... and have asked others to pray too.  I don't know what it's going to take... and its' not even so much I want to rekindle our friendship.. I just want her to turn from the paganism and turn to Jesus.   She needs Him, and she doesn't even realize it.   What do you say to a person who is lost in a deep dark black storm and on a doomed path... but they're so "enjoying' the storm they don't even see they're heading for destruction.   Jesus is the only one who can save her.  I ask now, you, my friends, to please pray for her.  


Tonight I think I'm going to start reading Holiness For Housewives.  Honestly, I need all the help I can get.   I am better with organization than I used to be.. and well...  I know we are all called to be saints.  But as you all can see in my above rant, I am not without my own issues and I admit I too have a looooong way to go.   Here, at home, our Domestic Church, and knowing that this is my vocation.. as a wife and mother.  I need to let things go and give them to God.  I am hoping I will learn a lot in this book.  Again, I say, I need all the help I can get!    God bless you all!  And have a beautiful Easter season!!   +JMJ+

Susan


 "A mother is the most important person on earth. She cannot claim the honor of having built Notre Dame Cathedral. She need not. She has built something more magnificent than any Cathedral -- a dwelling for an immortal soul, the tiny perfection of her baby's body." -- Joseph Cardinal Mindszenty

2 comments:

  1. Your girls look so pretty for Easter Sunday! That little niece is adorable :)
    Don't forget that your cyber-buddies all love you - we are your 'friends in faith!'

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  2. Thank you very much! And my niece.. LOL I am just silly about that baby! :)

    I love you all, my cyber buddies. :) I am very blessed to have ya'll! :) Thank you for that Miss Karen. :)

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