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Monday, August 22, 2011

Sometimes......


Sometimes I feel like the luckiest girl in the world.  And sometimes I am so sad I don't even want to get out of bed.
  
Sometimes I want to do all I can to please... and sometimes I wonder why I even bother.  Because sometimes I can't seem to do anything right.  And sometimes certain people make me feel so bad... that I just want to disappear.  Forever.

Sometimes I feel like I have to keep up a front.  And sometimes I feel like it's not even worth the effort to fake it.

Sometimes I wonder if real, true friends even exist.  Sometimes I think a friend is someone who is nice as long they can manipulate you, use you, or control you.  Sometimes I think the worst one is the finger pointing "friend" who plays the "holy" card..  another way to manipulate!!

Sometimes I think bad thoughts.  And sometimes I dream as a child would dream.  Sometimes I want to move far away from anyone who ever knew me, and forget my own name.

Sometimes, I just laugh.  And sometimes, I cry.  Sometimes I rejoice, and sometimes I can't get the tears to stop.



2 comments:

  1. Sometimes.....I feel exactly the same way! {{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}

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  2. Susan, I have often wanted to run away from people I know, to be free and not worry about what they think of me. These days though I don't seem to see anyone! I have let friendships slip as family matters have taken priority. These days most of my friends are online. And now I wonder what they think of what I write! I guess we are never totally free. We have to deal with others. But in the short time I have known you I would say that you are a strong person, ready to be who you are regardless of other people's opinions. But I know that even when we are strong, we have moments when we are tired or vulnerable, when words and actions hurt and our confidence falls. Sending love and prayers and totally accepting friendship your way. xx

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